March 2010
1 post
hiatus
I’m making my own personal one of these. See ya later.
February 2010
2 posts
12:00 time lag
I start and end my weekdays with habits.
Morning habits, driving habits, your, sometimes strange, habits.
Walk my habitual routes to class, sit in my assigned seats, talk to the people who sit near me, carry on through the academic routine of each teacher, maybe eat a bagel with cream cheese at break.
Drive home, or to lunch with ned.
Go on my computer, play ukulele, or walk pilot until 3:15
...
I need a support system. Someone who won’t put the blame on me, assume and expect the worst based on the worst they see in me, tell me my innermost flaws, dwell in the past, dwell on my mistakes, point out my own fault in all my misfortune. I guess that’s another reason I enjoy lacrosse so much. If I make mistakes, my team is there to either help me change what I did wrong, or reinsure...
January 2010
14 posts
FLOW DAMNIT, FLOW.
I’m trying to go with the god damn flow, OKAY? I’m kind of white water rafting at the moment!
moons back in town
You might not be able to decide which course of action makes the most sense. Don’t waste energy trying to force an answer now, for it probably won’t be the right one unless it comes to you easily. Wait for your intuition to guide you in the right direction.
Listen
Soo, positive thinking = good luck with girls?
HIGH LIGHT OF MY DAY.
“Oh, by the way, I took the liberty of asking her about you.”
“YOU WHAT?”
“Yeah, I was all ‘What do you think of Paige? Think she’s uh, think she’s cute?’ And she was like ‘Yeah, why?’ and I was like ‘She may think your pretty cute too.’ Then she got all smiley and giddy and shit. Kinda like how...
pronouns
Thank GOD I am not in 6th period Scherr.
what goes around
Bingo Kiddo.
flow
My friend gives me some honest, solid, well informed advice.
I mull it over.
My horoscope says the same basic thing with some ominous warnings.
I start to stress and plan accordingly.
I thrive given control and information, yet consult my horoscope as if it’s a deity. At least I can stop and smell the irony.
tweak fest
9:00 pm- 11:10 pm write final draft of 10 page essay
11:30-11:59 complete physics web assign by midnight while typing up works cited for essay
12:10 am - 2:10 am try and understand math.
alarm goes off in 3 hours and 20 minutes.
7:00 am math test
1st- review final rough draft individually with Ms. Sturgeon,
-somehow complete english AND spanish packet before either (sturgeon,...
sport chant
What are the odds that within the last minute I can lock in the final answer to my last physics webassign problem (which I was frantically calculating), KernKraft 400 happens to come on my itunes? My computer secretly loves me and roots me on. :]]
sh.
You close your eyes when you cry. That’s ok. Just don’t keep them closed too long. Things have become beautiful since you last looked. There’s nothing more to cry about.
I love people who reach out to specific others. Wether they reach them or not.
Resolved
My new years resolution is to be positive. I’m leaving my well of negative thoughts and manifesting in 2009 where it belongs.
Killll mee.
day 1- concussion, threw up
day 2- got drunk, threw up
day 3- happily did not throw up
day 4- got drunk, threw up
day 5- hung over, threw up
day 6- got food poisoning, threw up
day 7- fine at school (yay?!) eat lunch, throw up. (damn it.)
day 8- this morning, wake up, throw up.
7 out of 8 days. I have no food in me, and I’m constantly trying to replace the water...
December 2009
15 posts
Era of Lost Innocence and Catalyzed Adolescence
This decade: (In no particular order)
[some are mentioned due to the relevance with the decade itself]
Moved away from the place I called home since birth
My first pet (Jerry the Hamster)
My first dog
First cell phone
First computer
First ipod
Traveled to France, Spain, England, Greece, Italy, Ireland, Scotland, Belgium, Turkey, various places in America all for the first time.
Left Our...
happy tones
I keep feeling the urge to reply, “Your mom.” to everything that is asked or said to me.
And I satiate that urge. I grew up with an older brother, and I will always have a touch of immature boy in my soul. So let’s stop being adults here and laugh along.
What’re you doing for new years tonight?
Your mom.
Fucking classic. Don’t set yourself up for it if you...
gone gone gone
I’d tell you to go back and retrace your steps to see what you missed, but I’ve already swept them away. And the things that can’t be swept away with the click of a button, have naturally faded before you have even begun to take the time to look. Funny how when you finally allow for something to grow naturally after restraining it for so long, it can die so quickly. Although, you...
Don't be intimidated by my cruel intentions.
All of this cat and mouse has brought to center stage one of my (lets be honest) favorite sides of myself. One that has been dormant for a while now. Let the games begin.
where I go, when I go there
no more memory anymore.
no more whispering anymore.
touch me
ɹǝʞɔǝɹʍ ǝɯoɥ
I liked her confidence. Sharing a chair with me, her arm around me, talking a bit too close. Giving people the hint to get lost when they interrupted our conversation. Giving me her number. Bringing up times she’s seen or thought about me when, who would’ve known, I was thinking about her too. Bringing up personal subjects with ease. Admitting to coming on to me with ease. She asked...
Being able to accept a compliment is very attractive.
I hope the love of my life will sing like her.
Isn’t it sad when you listen to lyrics that...
achille's has nothing on you.
People always ask us personal questions when we’re together. Or make a comment about us. Last night, the token drunk girl who neither of us really know that well, plops down with us and starts with the questions.
Always such awkward questions.
And then there’s the dancing.
Dancing in high school is such a sexual release for us. Us, meaning teenagers. Shameless sexual grinding. If...
I feel you in my bones.
Have you ever met someone’s alter ego? Does that make any sense? Some people talk about their lives, or think in a manner in which you just know they feel they are some one else inside. They have an alter ego if you will. I officially have met one. There is actually someone out there who is the person you want to be. To a T. In fact, now that I think about it, i have met my own as well.
How do you have friends?
We never want to believe the things our mothers tell us in anger. The bad traits that, of course, we don’t really have. People don’t really think that or see that side. They are my friends and you are my parent. That’s all..
But when you hear the same exact words from more then one person you’ve been intimately involved with… That’s just hard to come to terms...
Not a drop.
Talking to you makes me forget my problems, and when I remember I have them you make me feel like moving on from them is a simple and happy process. Thank you for giving me the time of day. Thank you for being so charming.
November 2009
17 posts
The word simultaneously excites me.
Why does “excite” always have to have a sexual connotation?
Anyone remember this song? 8th grade memories.
may not be cool, but it's so where I live.
I love one of the songs from spring awakening. Ever listen to a song and it sounds as if the lyrics are words stolen from your mouth?
How did I end up in Canada?
I truly thought long and hard about it today..
and I think, if the prophecy of 2012 actually came true,
after a long day off escaping outrageous natural disasters,
after flying a plane to safety without any training,
after barely escaping hurdling down into a 30,000 ft. deep crevice,
after watching california be destroyed along with the rest of the world,
I would still be absolutely THRILLED...
by the sound
By the way, my essay is FLAWLESS. I could get into Harvard based on this essay alone.
storage
I always hear phrases, or songs and think about how I’d like to incorporate them into my blogs one day. But I’m so anal about my blog that I’ll only add something in if I feel it’s fitting to the emotion behind what I’m writing. I have a big file of titles I’d like to title entries. It just occurred to me that is strange.
Word of your body
Dear elbow,
I’m sorry I hit you all the time on things. I’m not quite sure why when turning around I let you lead the way.
All my love,
Paige <3
I had fun.
Social formalities are ridiculous. Disguised little phrases with deeper meanings… As if we can’t already see the obvious reality of how things are? I’m a very straight forward person. I don’t feel the need to verbally confirm an unspoken agreement. If I could just be blunt about everything, no matter how sensitive the topic, my god would I have more time to do things I need...
This song explains my mind right now pretty well I...
October 2009
6 posts
get up again
I hate Halloween. Every year, people ask me: “You excited for Halloween?!”
I say “No, fuck Halloween.”
They always ask, “HOW could you not like Halloween!?”
I have neither the time or patience to answer them.
why I hate halloween:
1. I don’t like candy. Now before you go all rambo on my ass, I do enjoy candy sometimes and it’s not like I hate...